Barbecue Summer

So the British Met Office is contrite about it's "long-term forecast" of a "barbecue summer" issued in June.

These people allegedly run the most powerful supercomputers but seem incapable of giving an accurate forecast one day ahead. Jerome K Jerome issued a warning in his gentle comic novel Three Men in a Boat on the fraud of weather forecasting 120 years ago. Plus ca change.

The Met Office cavil that the weather will not improve in August. Right then, where should I purchase the high-factor Ambre Solaire?

Doc Brown

Interesting to see my friend Doc Brown switching from hip-hop to stand-up - and making such a success of it. Nice piece in the Independent today. Check him out at the Edinburg Fringe. Sik!

JK Rowling's praise for Roddy Doyle

Nice to see Harry Potter's creator, JK Rowling heap praise on Dublin author Roddy Doyle. She describes him - on Oprah Winfrey's website - as a 'genius' for writing, as a heterosexual man so convincingly in the persona of a woman. She is referring to his novel on the theme of wife beating, The Woman who Walked into Doors. One of his few books I haven't read: must rectify that.

Moon and Mermaids

Mention of Limerick and today's date reminded me where I was forty years ago, as Apollo 11 landed men on the Moon for the the first time. I was in Foynes Co Limerick at Mermaid Week, a regatta for the Mermaid dinghy. The host was the genial Bob Mulrooney, who I'd met the previous year while teaching kids to sail on the Shannon. What a time! The "giant step for mankind" was unforgettable too.

Authors and telling the truth

I found this quite amusing. I had a long chat some time ago with recently deceased Frank McCourt (RIP) - author of Angela's Ashes - at a reception for Nick Laird's Utterly Monkey. Frank was terribly friendly and was interested in my experience at the Open University. Quite a few people in Limerick claimed his book was a fiction. I think they were possibly the petit bourgeousie who dreaded the tourist board's image of Limerick being diluted.

9 common words Women Use

9 common words Women Use

1. Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.
2. Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.
3. Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.
4. Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!
5. Loud Sigh : This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to #3 for the meaning of nothing.)
6. That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.
7. Thanks: A woman is thanking you, do not question, or Faint. Just say you're welcome.
8. Whatever: Is a women's way of saying
9. Don't worry about it, I got it : Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking "What's wrong?" For the woman's response refer to #3.